Volume 34, Number 4 - Spring 1995
"Excuses"
Excuses, excuses. Everyone has excuses.
School teacher John Lillie is credited with putting together this list of excuses teachers got from parents of absent children.
"Dear School; pleas ackuse John for bean absent on Jan. 28,29, 30, 32, and 33."
"Chris have an acre in his side."
"Mary coult not come to school because she was bothered by vary close veins.
"John as been absent because he has two teeth taken out of his face."
"I kape Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I didn’t know what size she wear."
"Please excuse Gloria. She has been sick and under the doctor."
"My son is under the doctor’s care and could not take P.E. Please execute him."
"Lillie was absent from school yesterday as she had a going over."
"Please excuse Blanch from P.E. a few days. Yesterday she fell out of a tree and misplaced her hip."
"Please excuse Joey Friday. He had loose vowels."
"Please excuse Joyce from Jim today. She is administrating."
"Carlose was absent from school yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part."
"My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent the weekend with the Marines."
"These excuse Johnny for being. It was his father’s fault."
"Please excuse Dianna from being absent yesterday. She was in bed with Gramps."
"Mary Ann was absent Dec. 11-15 because she had a fever, sore throat, headache, and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever, sore throat, her brother had a low grade temp and ached all over. I wasn’t feeling the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be flu going around - father even got hot last night."
Our thanks to Dr. Charles Baker for providing this article from a 1970 edition of the "Birmingham News." -Ed.
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